i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
