My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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