Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
