i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
There's always time for handjobs
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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