Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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