Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
