There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
PANTIES FOUND
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