Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
