her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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