Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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