I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
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