I hate your face
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
