it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I think people are normalizing furries
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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