i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
