I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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