IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
