The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize
