its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
