did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
