Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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