we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
She announced her abortion via fbk
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I want you more than these girls want KFC
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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