The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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