so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
