Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
a search helicopter?!
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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