Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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