they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
My cat gives me a boner
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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