Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
