haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Holy shit dude........stairs
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I think I just sharted jello shots
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize