Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Dignity is for republicans.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
