Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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