gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
