Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
