So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
