btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
