I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
