I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
