I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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