but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize