3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
North Korea, Best Korea!
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Can I color on your dick again?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
