As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
