We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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