If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
