She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
