kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
