ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
