Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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