I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
