another moral hangover. fuck.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
