Are we in a gay sports bar?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
