if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize