I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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