This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
